soulsinging247

AAAAAH! It's my LAST CAMP DAY! (yesssss!) tomorrow we start heading back to Colorado and I stop at my house in Maryland. Wee! I'm so ready to go home. One more week until I am home. W00t!

I have a cow.
it's name is Tipsy-Ro
Tip my cow and DIE

Well I got my new computer today and that was exciting. It's a gateway notebook with an AMD 64(x2) bit dual core processor, 1 Gig of RAM, 100Gig Hard Drive....yeah. It's pretty awesome. It cost me about $950 too. But it was worth it I think. I definitely am enjoying the wicked speed of the thing.

So I'm in Delaware at my last camp and so far the camp itself is going great. My crew however could be better considering we're barely talking to eachother anymore. I'm really just ready for it to be over now. I don't exactly know what I did but obviously I did something because no one will say like 2 words to me anymore and if I even attempt to talk to them it's like...totally blown off and they run away. Whatever, I don't even care anymore. I just want this summer to be over now.

I miss you guys. Seriously, attack me when I get home. I'll be home Aug.5 but really really late so like...Aug.6 start attacking me. I really need friends right now. I've kind of forgotten what it is like to have them since my crew consists of 3 wonderful people who have something against me and thus will not talk to me at all.

oh well.

I love them anyway.

just to clarify, ben walsh is weird.


we love him, but he's weird.


LOVE



but weird


kinda like me

So i'm looking at my display picture and thinking....hey...um, that's not my hair color anymore.*sad* and i'm wearing red in that picture...AUUUGH. i have to wear red for work EVERY day so ...yeah. no more red for me for a while when i get home. Anyway, my hair isn't blonde. So that picture isn't accurate. My hair is now like...brownish burgundy thing...
it looked really good when i first dyed it. Now it is fading (*le sad*) but oh well. I think i'm going to get something to strip the color out and just get it back to it's original state.


though i'd rather just re-dye. but blonde roots look weird.

So here I am in Rochester, NY and let me tell you, things are CRAZY. I was in near tears before getting here because I am sooooo tired. I just want to sleep for a billion hours in a real bed! But here I am...and things are going semi-ok. I talked with my crew and they are helping me work on some things about myself. For instance, I have this nasty habit of getting overly anxious and then snapping at people and working myself into a nervous breakdown of some sort. Anyway, I'm so much more relaxed now. I've had a few big messes come my way this week but I've been able to handle everything without getting upset at all. It's a nice change. Things with my crew are going a lot better too. Mostly, I think, because I've relaxed a lot more. This is Kristina's camp to be a mess I think. She's not doing so hot. Haha...speaking of hot. No AC and no windows makes this office into an OVEN. I is HOT!

Anyway, gotta go deal with the Staples corp. headquarters and their questioning my ST119.1 form apparently. Yay. I'll talk to y'all later. PLEASE CALL ME AND SAY HI!!!!!

Well this is my last day here in East Machias, Maine and then we are on our way towards New York. I get to pull an all-nighter tonight 'cause I gotta work through the night tearing down the school, packing the truck, doing all this paperwork, etc. Kristina and I both get to be up all night. yippee (not so much). But fortunately Heyward and Brandon get to sleep so they can drive tomorrow. Fortunately for them, that is...nooot so much for me. But oh well, I have my milkshake and coffee to keep me movin all through the night and then tomorrow once we get to Augusta, Maine I will be collapsing into a REAL bed (I've been sleeping on an air mattress on a concrete floor all week) and I will sleep pretty much from like 2PM Saturday till like 10AM Sunday or something. yeah. mmmm sleep. yummy.

OK off to work.

LATA

Maine and I get along well.
There's some wicked fog here.
Obviously Maine understands me.


I'm tired of settling. I am going to persue more in my life. Someone who actually cares, a dream that I want...and if I fail, then I fail. But failure is relative. Some would consider what I have now to be failure. Perhaps.

So here I am in Maine at my second camp of 4 for this summer and I happen to meet this guy Scott. Now let me tell you about Scott...he's an editor at Group publishing (The publishing company that is associated with the non-profit organization I'm working for this summer.) Group publishing publishes bible study curriculum, vacation bible school stuff, and a lot more. So Scott was telling me about his job as an editor and I was so jealous. He asked what I was studying and I told him that I was an English major and also seeking Secondary Ed certification. So here's the exciting part...Scott wants me to freelance through him and then eventually help me get a job as an editor when I graduate.

This...is amazing. Here I am going into my sophmore year of college and already I have careers opening up to me. I'm so psyched. I told you all that I didn't really want to teach...well here is a way that I won't have to. PLUS I get to work in an AMAZING environment. I've seen the office...it's incredible...PLUS I would be in a Christian atmosphere and I would be working with the organization that changed my life. It's incredible to me. But then, God has always been incredible.

So...I may be moving to Colorado once I graduate, depending on how all this goes. I talked to my mom about it and she said to follow where I think I was meant to be. Who knows, maybe Colorado has a place for me.

Peace,
Lisa

OK So I'm in Maine...Machias Maine. It's been a crazy start to this week and I'm so psyched! There are great lobsters and blueberries here...mm. oh and blueberry coffee...definitely the bestest.


Having an AWESOME summer

-Lisa

I can't make you love me if you don't
you can't make your heart feel
something it won't
here in the dark
in these final hours
i will lay down my heart
i'll feel the power
but you won't
no you won't.

Why am I so afraid of being alone? I seriously cannot sleep tonight because I'm too busy crying over my fear of being alone. I don't want to be single again. I don't want to be alone again. I don't want to be left again.

Everyone leaves.
duh.
I already knew that.


did i mention my father is probably going to file again soon.

joy.

wonder if i make it through this summer.

Short update from Estest Colorado! This summer I'll be traveling to Maine, New York, and Delaware to set up camps. My job is INSANE and my crew is awesome but I miss you all so much! Sometimes I just want to come home. Be prepared to get lots of hugs from me when I get back! Yesterday I climbed a mountain!!! 10,000 feet! WOO! it was awesome!!! <3 you all. Miss you all. LOVE YOU GUYS!!!!


LiSA k.

pS. Call the cell!!!!!! PLEASE

Well y'all...HERE I GO!!!!
I'm off for the summer to work for GroupWorkCamps!!!! I leave in about 20 min to fly to Colorado where I will be trained and then I'll travel all over the country setting up missions camps for teenagers to come and repair the homes of low-income families/disabled individuals in certain communities throughout the country. I'im SOOOO excited! As some of you know, I've been to 3 of these camps as a camper and now I get to work for them! Don't worry, there will be much updating once I return on August 5. But until then...

Live...Love...Serve

have a great summer and congrats to all my graduating buddies!

don't you get that i need you...


not that my silence helps anything.



i just don't know what to say or how to say it or why i should










EGO praesumo non peto ut own meus animus.
Requietem in pax.

White flowers under flourescent moonlight.



That's what I want on my stone.

Well I have finally finished Psych 100. Yay. I think I may actually get a B too, which is good 'cause I need one. Sold the devil book on my way back from the exam. $16 for a book I paid $60 for. Bah. College books. Now I have to go to my last 308 class (waaah!! :( sad). Then it is time to start the major major MAJOR studying for exams.


death by finals week.

happy mother's day...mom.

i miss...




i wish...



i remember...

Well thus begins the final two weeks of my first year at college. But that certainly doesn't mean I get to relax or anything! I mean as soon as finals are done, I'm flying right out to Colorado for training (which I have been warned is exhausting. joy.) I'm really looking forward to this summer now. WorkCamp has always been an intensely emotional thing for me. I became a Christian there and I met some of the most influential people in my life there. I know that this summer will be life changing. There is nothing else that this summer could be. I truly believe I will come back from this summer a different (and yes, in a good way) person.

I should say...I have my concerns. I'm worried about doing so much driving. I'm worried about the possibility of getting into a car accident or something. I'm worried about the people I'm going to meet. Worried that there will be intense drama that will just like blow up while I'm there. I mean come on..its 2 guys and 2 girls traveling together all summer. Living together...becoming like family. Drama is bound to ensue. I'm worried about my own personal relationship...and whether it will last through the summer. But that's kind of just a constant worry to me. I mean...I've never made it this long with someone and been like...sure I wanted it to continue. But I really do, and it scares me that it might not. I'm worried about my family and what may go on with them while I'm gone. What if my greatgrandmother dies and I'll be with these people I don't know when it happens and unable to go to the funeral...I mean do you know how awful that would be??? Ok yeah, I'm a pessimist.

The truth is, I know this summer will be great. I know it will change me for the better. And I know I will come home more like the person I want to be. For those of you who believe in prayer...please pray for me this summer. I would very much appreciate it. I love you all.

<3 Lisa

I have made the decision that from now on I am not going to drink until I am 21. I relalized that I really lack control when it comes to drinking. When I drink, I plan to drink to the point of drunkenness...and that's a problem in my eyes. Drinking should not be about getting drunk. It should be in moderation and controlled, not controlling. I obviously lack the capacity at this point in my life to maintain control when drinking. I drink until I feel it. or rather...until I cease to feel. That is a problem. But don't worry, I'll still party with y'all. Just in a state of sobriety. And yes, I am truly commited to this. I decided something similar in high school when I realized I was not ready to date after my first boyfriend. Similarly, I am not ready to drink. So from now on...I'll just have a bit of a caffeine and sugar fix at parties. And beer pong? Well...someone will just have to drink for me. It may be difficult because I do crave the escape sometimes...but it's just not good for me to allow alcohol to make me lose control. But no worries y'all, I'm just as crazy when I have sugar ^_^ only I don't fall over lol.